What If I Am Ordinary???

What if I am just…ordinary?

What if all those voices telling me to be top of the class or best on the team or thinner or smarter or faster or ‘better’ somehow were wrong all along??

What if they were lying???

And what if I’ll never really ‘arrive’ anywhere anyway? Even if I achieve that ONE thing?

Won’t there always be another thing in line? One MORE thing to achieve?

And what if I’m not any of that? What if I don’t want ANY of that?

What if it all feels like NOISE???

And what if my ideal day begins with silence? And keys clicking and tomatoes in the garden and hummingbirds flitting at the feeder and sleepy little heads and scrambled eggs on the stove?

What if I spend most of my time on earth raising kids and writing words and calling friends and curling up next to my husband on the couch after a long day?

What if I never have anything more than THIS?

What if my life is ordinary? And I am just…ordinary?

What if I don't want anything MORE?

Or need anything MORE?

What if I refuse to STRIVE anymore!?!

Because it feels like life is here and love is here and people are here and God is RIGHT HERE...

In the ordinary.

So, what if I just want to be…ordinary?

On purpose??