I Hate Change

Raise your hand if you hate change!!!

I HATE change. I HATE confrontation. I absolutely HATE making people unhappy.

I want everyone to like me (and ALL the decisions I make) ALL of the time.

People-pleaser???

Ummm. Yeah, I’d say so.

I’ll drag my feet for YEARS to resist change or avoid hurting anyone’s feelings. I’ll tell myself, ‘Everything’s FIIIIINE’ even if everything is, in fact, NOT fine.

Sometimes the romantic ideas I have about life and actual REALITY are two very different things. And no matter how hard I try, I cannot get the two to align.

Then before I know it, LIFE starts constricting around my chest until I can’t breathe…and change becomes inevitable.

We’ve had big changes for our family over the years.

We moved to a new state 1,000 miles away. I started working only very part time, then a couple years ago nearly none at all. We switched our kids’ nannies or sports teams or schools. We decided we aren’t always going to be ‘home’ for Christmas.

Unfortunately, every time we’ve made a big decision…a decision that means CHANGE…someone is left unhappy. Annoyed. Disappointed. Let down. Angry.

And I struggle so hard to not feel guilty.

I wonder, ‘Will people still like me???’

But the truth is, I CANNOT make ALL the people happy ALL the time. I can’t. I’ve tried.

It’s impossible.

And the truth is, some of those REALLY HARD CHANGES have turned out to be some of the absolute best decisions I’ve made in my life.

Even if a few people felt let down for a little while. Even if a few people disagreed. Even if some people were unhappy. Even if, maybe, now they don’t like me so much.

I do the best I can. I try to make the best possible decisions for me…and my family.

Because really, isn’t that what we’re all trying to do here?? Our best??

I truly believe EVERYONE is doing the best they can with what they have at the time and the only way they know how.

We weigh our options.

We pray.

We move forward.

We pray some more.

We trust.

We live with the results.

Truly, this really is the BEST we can do.

And you know what??

It turns out I’M pretty pleased about that