Jul 5

Jul 5 The Absolute BEST Thing You Can Say to a Mom Who is Struggling

You know how when your first baby was born, and you let a little complaint slip out about how you were tired because your baby wasn’t sleeping and has been cranky all day from teething?

And people would say things like, “It goes so fast! Enjoy every moment!! You’re going to miss this!” And it would feel like you were being squashed. As if it wasn’t okay to feel all the feelings of young motherhood??

Well, the version of that for us older moms who are letting go of our now grown babies heading off for college and out into the real world is…

“This is what is SUPPOSED to happen! Our kids are supposed to grow and leave! They can’t be little forever! Just cut the apron strings!!”

As if we’re not supposed to feel sad. As if we’re not supposed to cry over stacks of laundry with smelly basketball jerseys that won’t be there by this time next year. As if we’re not supposed to stop at the sound of the garage door opening because our baby is home, and in a few short days he’ll be coming ‘home’ most nights to somewhere else. Somewhere that isn’t OUR home!

I texted a friend the other day about the panic settling in my chest because my baby is leaving. It is HAPPENING. And it feels like a thousand tiny goodbyes.

And you know what she replied???

“You get to be really, really sad if you need to be.”

I can’t think of a more reassuring answer.

Moms, we can feel ALL the feelings of motherhood!

If you’re tired because your baby isn’t sleeping and is cranky all day from teething…you get to feel really, really tired.

If you’re anxious because your elementary kid is struggling with school and big emotions and fitting in and you’re not sure how to handle it…you get to feel really, really anxious.

If you’re scared because your eighth grader is being bullied at school and wrote something very hard in her paper at school sparking a call from the principal…you get to feel really, really scared.

If you’re bursting with pride because your high schooler scored the shot to win the game and he REALLY needed that win…you get to feel really, really proud.

If you’re sad because your once tiny baby turned 18 and graduated high school and now he's leaving for college, and you can’t believe how fast it really did go…

You get to be really, really sad if you need to be.