Mikala Albertson MD

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Parenting is Hard ... For Everyone

Of course, I’ve heard it before…

Parenting is so hard.

But I just thought that was something parents said like “Eat your vegetables” or “Close the door” or “Take your shoes off in the house.”

“Parenting is so hard.”

Yeah, yeah sure.

But, you guys, it is!!

I thought I’d be good at it.

For some reason I didn’t think it would be that hard for me.

Why??

I have no idea.

I just thought since I wanted to be a mom so badly, I’d probably do everything right once I had children.

I figured I would set rules and boundaries and impose consequences and practice unconditional love and so I would surely have responsible, respectful (read: perfect) children!!

Instead I have mommy-meltdowns far too often and sometimes forget to love unconditionally leaving me with sassy mouths and eye rolls and a little girl who rules us all!

It is just so hard!!

I didn’t realize there would be so much laundry. I didn’t realize I would wash three loads of dishes a day. I had no idea once I began having children, I would never again sleep for seven or more hours straight for the rest of my life!

Nobody really mentioned the constant worry and second-guessing myself. Or the noise and the bickering.

My goodness, the bickering!!

Nobody told me I’d wake up in the morning with loving and precious thoughts, teary over my wonderful family and my wonderful life, and within thirty minutes of coming downstairs want to walk out the door and never come back!!

Even in the middle of those warm tender moments like singing the birthday song or opening gifts on Christmas morning, sometimes I catch myself paralyzed with fear I’m not enjoying it enough.

Am I being present?

Am I noticing it all?

Am I grateful?

Even when everything is SO GOOD I find myself wondering, is it good enough??

No one told me I’d want to fast-forward, pause, and rewind all within the span of about thirty minutes.

It is all so hard. The good, the bad, the ordinary.

But can I let you in on something???

IT IS HARD FOR EVERYONE!!!

We’re all in this together.

Sure, it looks like that mom on Instagram has it all figured out because of those filtered pictures of her adorable family sitting down to gluten-free blueberry pancakes on Saturday morning before their weekly trip to the Farmer’s Market, but I’m here to tell you that is only part of the truth.

I’m just certain two minutes after that picture was taken her kids broke out into a fight over who got the pink plate and spilled a glass of milk all over those blueberry pancakes and the mom lost her mind and yelled something like, “You better figure it out and sit down and eat those pancakes right now or you are all going to your room for the rest of the day!!!” with a crazed look in her eyes.

It is SO hard.

We are all just trying to get through.

And you know what??

Parenting is hard…but so worth it.

And I bet we are ALL doing better than we think.