I’ve been schlepping kids to games and practices and tournaments and then home again for years.

YEARS.

And for most of those years, I always had a baby or a toddler and a few other little kids in tow.

Here’s how it went…

‘Do you have your water bottle??? Where are your shin guards??? Did you bring your other jersey??? I don’t know which field you’re on. Look for your team.’

‘You guys, no. We JUST ate. You can’t possibly want a snack!!’

‘Can you reach her binky on the floor?? Can you pass him his sippy cup??’

‘Can you do something to stop her crying??? I know. She’s just fussy. She didn’t get a nap. We’re almost there.’

‘Hey, grab your sister!! Hold his hand in the parking lot!!’

‘Come on you guys, let’s go. We gotta go pick up your big brother.’

‘Can you carry this?? I can’t possibly carry another thing!!!’

‘No. We’re NOT getting fast food!!’

In and out. Up and down. Back and forth.

I nursed babies on the bleachers. I scheduled their naps around practice times. I packed a bag with toys and snacks and sippy cups and changes of clothes.

I constantly walked back and forth to the bathroom to change diapers or get a little bottom to the potty because SHE HAS TO GO NOW!!!!!

And it felt like that time would never end.

I thought I’d ALWAYS be wrangling a herd of little people everywhere I went.

But then tonight…

My baby (the very littlest one) pulled on her big brothers’ hand-me-down cleats and little blue socks and itty-bitty shin guards and marched out on the soccer field.

It was HER TURN to play!!!

And I got to watch by myself in the comfort of my folding chair in the shade.

My baby, you guys.

She ran and laughed and kicked and dribbled.

She scored a goal then turned to me with a smile and stuck her little thumb up in the air.

She screamed an ear-piercing scream the entire time her team played a game of tag.

She got nailed in the stomach with the ball during their scrimmage. And she stood there for a minute thinking about whether or not she should burst into tears. Her eyes met mine. She was still deciding. Then she wiped her cheeks and ran off after the ball.

I smiled. Relieved. Tough girl!

She once put her little hands on her little hips and had something to say to all those boys. And boy I wish I could’ve heard it. I’m just sure it was something sassy.

I WATCHED THE WHOLE TIME.

I soaked it in.

I couldn’t pull my eyes away.

I laughed and smiled and nodded and cheered. So proud.

Not a sippy cup in sight.

You guys, I LOVED having babies.

I loved those sippy cups and binkies and diapers and nursing sweet little ones in the car before shoving them into the baby carrier on my chest.

It was exhausting, yes. But it was the gift of my life.

I thought.

And really, I didn’t EVER want it to end!!!

But now…

Now, I get to watch MY BABY do big girl things.

I get to watch all my babies actually GROW UP into these amazing people!

And THAT.

That is the gift of my life.

Who knew???

Now I’m just over here on the sideline.

Cheering!!